Gary Chapman’s excellent book The Five Love Languages examines the way that we give and receive love. Looking at the possibly fallacies behind my perception about how others are expressing their love towards me or their need for love from me absolutely changed the way I view my relationships–with my husband, my children, and even my friends.
At one of the conferences he holds around the country, a husband who found out his wife’s love language was Acts of Service said defiantly, “If it is going to take washing dishes, vacuuming floors, and doing the laundry for my wife to feel loved, you can forget it.” Gary Chapman observed that “He had the knowledge of love but not the attitude of love” (page 5). It surprised him that people would know how to love, and yet choose not to show love.
His new book Love as a Way of Life is written to show us how to love those around us effectively. In it, he offers seven traits that are the foundation for every language of love (including among others, kindness, patience and courtesy). Each chapter begins with a tool that helps the reader assess his or her strengths or weaknesses in the area, and then provide
s guidance throughout about habits to acquire which can make that personality trait become a reality for you. These practical suggestions are simple, yet inspiring.
Each chapter closes with three additional ways to make it personal:
- asking what would your relationship be like if you took some of these practical steps to love
- giving several questions for discussions and reflection
- suggesting several actions you can take to apply this in your life
In addition to devoting a chapter to each of these seven traits, Chapman addresses making a love a way of life in situations that might be difficult to put others first–parenting, marriage, and the workplace– devoting a chapter to each of these relationships.
If you haven’t yet read a The Five Love Languages, I would ask why haven’t you read that groundbreaking and life-changing book? However, it is not necessary to read it in order to understand these concepts.
Love as a Way of Life releases on Tuesday, July 15. It’s my opinion that people who are seeking to show love to others will consider this a must-read book that will earn a permanent spot on their bookshelves. This is a “Christian book,” but he focuses more on relationships with people than a relationship with Jesus, so I think it would be appealing to anyone looking to love and serve others in their lives.
I have two copies to give away (U.S. shipping addresses only). If you’d like to win a copy, tell me why in the comments. I’ll post the winners on Wednesday, July 23.
Five Minutes for Books reviewer Melissa has also reviewed this book (with another giveaway) on her personal blog, Breath of Life, so click on over and check out her thoughts as well.
Jennifer is a contributing editor at 5 Minutes for Mom, where she also authors the 5 Minutes for Books column. She has been blogging at Snapshot for over two years. You’ll almost always find her holding on to either a book, a fork, a child’s hand, her laptop, or some combination therein.
I would like to receive a copy of this book. I’ve read Love Languages and Love Languages for Children. But I still struggle witht the practical, especially with my friends. I’ve always felt that I didn’t learn how to be a good friend and have good relationships. This book sounds like it’s the next step for me to learn. I do have what I would consider good friends but I don’t think I am always a good friend to them, if that makes sense. Thanks for the recommendation and the chance at the book.
I am a big fan of the 5 Love Languages book, as well as the LL book for children. Also, Gary Chapman’s co-author on those books, Ross Campbell, has written some wonderful things, including one I just finished reading – How to Really Love Your Child. I think this concept of loving others is paramount for living in today’s society. After all, “love covers a multitude of sins”…
After 17+ years of marriage, I feel we need to reconnect. Both working full time jobs with 2 kids, it just doesn’t seem like we have any time for each other. I think this book would be helpful!
I also think that the 5 Love Languages book is a life-changing book. This book sounds wonderful as well. Thanks for the review!
I have read the 5 Love Languages several years ago and recommended it to several people. This book looks like a great extension of it, I’d like to see if it would be worth doing with our small group.
I have read the Five Love Languages for Children and found it helpful in understanding how different people feel loved. This new book sounds good too.
You can never have too many lessons about how to love others. I’d love to win a copy.
I read the 5 Love Languages several years ago and thought it was an awesome book. I recently started a new job, and several of the people I work with are a bit difficult. The section on how to show love in the workplace would be perfect.
I plan to go to the Christian book store today to purchase a copy for my daughter, who is going thru some very trying times in her marriage. Then if I win this one, I will have one for me to help in all my relationships. Thank you for the review and the opportunity to win.
I’m giving away two copies as well. Hope that’s okay to say here. 😉
http://monicabrand.net/2008/07/15/book-giveaway-love-as-a-way-of-life-by-gary-chapman/
My husband and I will be celebrating our 19th anniversary next month. Sometimes it’s hard to think of new ways to show him that he’s still number one to me! I’d love the book!
I would love to win this book as I have read the 5 Love Languages and am trying to put the practical advice and knowledge to work in my relationships. It totally makes so much sense to me and helped me to understand individual needs. I would love to learn more about it and how to use it everyday!!
The 5 Love Languages is simple and yet earth shattering when you stop and think about it for 2 seconds. Fabulous book. This one sounds, as one commentor already stated, like a great extension. I’m half tempted to go buy a copy of the book today! =D Great review. Thanks for bringing it to our attention. (And no, I don’t expect to be included in the giveaway. 😉
I would love to win this book. I have often looked at Five Love Languages and been VERY tempted but somehow by-passed them. Love as a Way of Life sounds like a wonderful opportunity for me to find a way better way of connecting with my husband. While I find myself kind and gentle with the children and friends… the way I interact with my husband is not the way I want to continue to…. so fingers crossed… and if nothing else I’ve have found a wonderful new site to bookmark and stop by and visit. Thanks for that.
Anything by Gary Chapman is a definite yes in my opinion – he writes great stuff! I read The Five Love Languages and it was really helpful to figure out not only my husband’s but each of our children, and even my own. Very, very helpful.
I would love to win this book because I am always trying to improve myself, my actions and ways of relating to others….with a Biblical basis and solid advice.
I’ve really enjoyed Dr. Chapman’s books- 5 Love Languages and The 4 Seasons of Marriage. I’d love to win a copy of this book, although I don’t know if I can hold out until the 23rd. If I can find time to make it to the bookstore before then, I will pick up a copy for myself. But, if I would win a free copy, I’d give it away as a gift. Books are my favorite gifts to give! 🙂
I would love to win this book. I have read If The Five Love Languages; in fact, I’ve given it as a gift TWICE to young couples. That tells you what I think of his work.
Our children’s ministry staff is looking for a great book to study together at lunchtime. We chose this book (at Melissa’s suggestion) to start in the fall. I’m gathering the $ to buy the books, so if I win one, I plan to donate this book to the group, and pass the savings again to the entire group (that way, the 6 of us will only have to purchase 5 books- less $$$ for each!)
Our group is excited to study this book to improve our relationships with each other (6 women in one office!) our relationships with our families (we have 13 kids between us! & 6 husbands), our volunteers (we have 300), and the children we minister to (1500 a week)- this book has the potential to be used by God to impact many, many people- how fun if were to win one! 🙂
This would be a very informative read helping me learn more about how to love and the ways in which everyone in my family loves, a very important tool to improving the dynamics of the family unit.
Loved the “love languages” books and would like to read this one to learn to apply the principles outside my own family circle! thanks for the opportunity!