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What He Must Be…If He Wants to Marry My Daughter

March 11, 2009 by Melissa

Currently there appears to be a shortage of godly young men. Church for Men reports, “The typical U.S. Congregation draws an adult crowd that’s 61% female, 39% male. This gender gap shows up in all age categories.” Unfortunately, the trend is getting worse. “As many as 90 percent of the boys who are being raised in church will abandon it by their 20th birthday.”

If, like me, you have a young daughter, these are scary statistics. Even though my girl isn’t far out of the “I’m going to marry Daddy” stage, I’m already concerned about the man she will marry. Author Voddie Baucham understands.

Any father with a daughter even approaching “marriageable age” knows exactly what I’m talking about. There simply aren’t many young men out there who look remotely like What He Must Be. Therefore, we have only one alternative—we must increase the supply. Somehow we have to produce more biblically qualified, Christian prospects for the millions of young women out there who simply cannot settle for less. In order to increase the supply, we must raise, surround ourselves with, and invest in godly young men.

How do parents accomplish this? That’s part of the premise of Baucham’s newest book, What He Must Be…If He Wants to Marry My Daughter. I’m so excited about this book because I can’t think of anything more important than making sure my daughter marries a man who loves Jesus and cherishes her.

Bauchman is quick to point out that it’s not just the parents’ responsibility. Our daughters also have to understand their part in the process, but it’s up to us to help them know exactly what that is.

First, this book will help young women gain a better understanding of what they should be looking for. As the old saying goes, if you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there. Sadly, this is precisely the way many young women approach marriage. Casual dating turns into a long-term relationship. A long-term relationship turns into a foregone conclusion. And eventually that foregone conclusion turns into a marriage. This does not have to be the case. There is more! We must help our daughters turn their affections away from cultural conditioning and toward biblical truth.

Second, this book will help young women see the importance of partnering with their parents in the courtship process. I believe most young women want their parents involved in this. Of course, the culture has painted them into a corner, and they don’t quite know how to get out. Nevertheless, many young women want some degree of help when it comes to choosing a mate. After all, this is the most life-altering decision they will make apart from coming to repentance and faith in Christ.

Finally, this book will help young women realize their dependence upon God. Reading the biblical characteristics of a godly man can be a bit intimidating. Since the bar has been set so low for so long in our culture, many of the qualities and characteristics seem strange, and perhaps a bit distant. But they are supposed to be. This book is not about what every Tom, Dick, and Harry already is; this is about what a God-honoring, Christ-exalting, Bible-believing husband must be. If it were easy or normal, there would be no need for this book. Only God can bring about the kind of change necessary in a young man to prepare him to be the kind of husband the Scriptures portray. Thus, reading this book should drive young women to their knees as they plead with God to make a man like this and bring him across their path. In the meantime, we must not settle for less than what he must be.
-from the chapter, “Multigenerational Vision”

Quite frankly, it doesn’t matter if you have a son or a daughter. Believers in Christ have a responsibility to build our youth and children into the men and women He wants them to be. In What He Must Be, Baucham has given an invaluable resource for those who take this responsibility seriously.

If you’d like to win one of two copies (U.S shipping addresses only) of this book. Please leave a comment. We’ll announce the winners on March 18.

The winner of At the Scent of Water is #17 Victoria.

If you did not receive an email from me, please send your shipping info to 5minutesforbooksATgmail(dot)com.

Melissa has been captivated by books for as long as she can remember. She resides in Virginia and at Breath of Life.

Filed Under: Christian, High School, Melissa, Non-Fiction, Parenting

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Comments

  1. Amy N. says

    March 11, 2009 at 1:01 pm

    this sounds like a great book. i have a son and would love to read it and i’d love to pass it on to my friends with daughters.

  2. Carrie, Reading to Know says

    March 11, 2009 at 2:09 pm

    No need to enter me in the contest (as I’m also participating in the blog tour & giveaway) but just wanted to say I enjoyed your post – esp. given your perspective with a daughter. I, of course, have a son, and cannot WAIT to get a hard copy of this book into my hands to see what Baucham has to say!

  3. Lauren says

    March 11, 2009 at 2:35 pm

    I am not entering either, of course, but I would like to read this!

  4. Marla T says

    March 11, 2009 at 2:44 pm

    I have a 19 year old daughter who this book, I believe would really help her to know what to look for in her future mate. Would love to win. Thank you for the entry.

    [email protected]

  5. Hillary says

    March 11, 2009 at 3:54 pm

    I’d love to win a copy! My husband is already dreading our two daughters growing up and dating, and they’re only 5 and 2.

  6. Chris says

    March 11, 2009 at 4:45 pm

    Wow, this book looks great!

  7. Stacie says

    March 11, 2009 at 4:48 pm

    I am already praying for my future daughters and sons in laws. I would love this book! Thanks!
    Staciele(at)netins(dot)net

  8. Angie says

    March 11, 2009 at 4:59 pm

    This sounds like a book that I need to read!

  9. Serena says

    March 11, 2009 at 5:04 pm

    I would LOVE to win this book!

  10. Angela C. says

    March 11, 2009 at 10:18 pm

    I would love to win a copy. Thanks for the giveaway.

    accoupons at gmail dot com

  11. HilLesha says

    March 12, 2009 at 5:42 am

    Sounds good! 🙂

  12. Maria Delgado says

    March 12, 2009 at 7:47 am

    Wonderful!

    I posted on my blog about this!

  13. Maria Delgado says

    March 12, 2009 at 7:47 am

    I get the feed.

  14. Maria Delgado says

    March 12, 2009 at 7:47 am

    I get your newsletter.

  15. Michael Capp says

    March 12, 2009 at 8:57 am

    I’d love to win!

  16. Linda White says

    March 12, 2009 at 9:13 am

    I have 3 daughters in the dating range and a son who is also! It is hard to find Christians to date! At that age they ARE getting bored and frustrated with church going! They need guidance from above!

  17. desiree kelley says

    March 12, 2009 at 9:41 am

    would love to read the book

  18. Gail says

    March 12, 2009 at 10:29 am

    That sounds interesting and I have sons and daughters!

  19. R.D. says

    March 12, 2009 at 11:58 am

    Count me in for this sweepstakes.

  20. Anita Yancey says

    March 12, 2009 at 12:12 pm

    Sounds interesting. Please enter me.
    ayancey(at)dishmail(dot)net

  21. Andria says

    March 12, 2009 at 12:28 pm

    This sounds like a good book. I have a 16 year old stepdaughter, and this book could be useful. Thank you

  22. c. clemens says

    March 12, 2009 at 12:31 pm

    enter me please

  23. Cheryl F. (The Lucky Ladybug) says

    March 12, 2009 at 12:51 pm

    I’d love to read this 🙂 *Thanks* for the giveaway!

  24. Mary says

    March 12, 2009 at 1:35 pm

    I would love to win this and share it with my teenage daughters. Thanks!

  25. susan varney says

    March 12, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    i’d love a copy

  26. Meredith Rogen says

    March 12, 2009 at 7:47 pm

    This looks like a good read to encourage dating those that believe what you do.

  27. michele anne jaquays says

    March 12, 2009 at 9:18 pm

    I would give this to my brother who has daughters. Sound like an good book.

  28. christopher h says

    March 12, 2009 at 10:24 pm

    love to win this

  29. wanda flanagan says

    March 13, 2009 at 12:10 am

    sounds awesome cant wait to check it out win or not im gonna get this one

  30. Charlotte Padgett says

    March 13, 2009 at 9:10 am

    Please enter me iin this drawing.

  31. Zoly says

    March 13, 2009 at 10:23 am

    Too late for my daughters. They are married, but my granddaughters are not.

  32. Gina Stratos says

    March 13, 2009 at 12:24 pm

    Sounds like a winner
    [email protected]

  33. Gina Stratos says

    March 13, 2009 at 12:24 pm

    Subscriber/Feed
    [email protected]

  34. Gina Stratos says

    March 13, 2009 at 12:25 pm

    Subscriber/Newsletter
    [email protected]

  35. lori w. says

    March 13, 2009 at 2:26 pm

    thanks for entering me

  36. veronica sandberg says

    March 13, 2009 at 4:55 pm

    want to win this

  37. tanya wilson says

    March 13, 2009 at 5:57 pm

    As somebody with 3 daughters, this book would be great! (one is already at dating age, and the other two are close!)

  38. edj says

    March 13, 2009 at 7:11 pm

    Sounds like a great book. Hope I win!

  39. autie says

    March 13, 2009 at 9:04 pm

    As a young Christian lady, this sounds intresting.

  40. Djp says

    March 13, 2009 at 11:53 pm

    thanks

  41. Christina says

    March 14, 2009 at 6:25 am

    I’ve seen so many parents with children who go off and marry people as a rebellion against the parents! I like the part where you write that we ALL should be raising good young men, whether they’re our particular children or not!

  42. Melissa says

    March 14, 2009 at 3:50 pm

    Wow! This looks like a great resource! I’ve got a baby girl, but have also been involved in college/career aged ministry for years. I think this will be a great resource not only for the young adults, but also for me, in a few years. :o) And I’m thinking it might be a good book to share with friends who have teenagers.
    Thanks!

  43. Stephanie'sMommyBrain says

    March 14, 2009 at 6:17 pm

    As a mom of 3 boys I want to see what I should be building into them. As the mom of 1 girl I want to learn how to help her hold out for God’s best.

    Those are frightening statistics but very believable. I’d love to pass this book to some girls in my church!

  44. connie says

    March 14, 2009 at 8:43 pm

    Looks like an interesting resource! Thank you!

    Connie

  45. Beth says

    March 14, 2009 at 9:32 pm

    I enjoyed your review very much. Please enter me. Looks like a very good book.

  46. Gary Osborn says

    March 14, 2009 at 9:53 pm

    Wooo Hooo Make me a winner!

  47. Mozi Esmes Mommy says

    March 15, 2009 at 1:55 am

    This looks like a terrific book – I have a little girl…

  48. Kathy Scott says

    March 15, 2009 at 7:15 am

    I wish that I had read this before I got married.

  49. Jennifer Hedden says

    March 15, 2009 at 9:40 am

    enter me

Newer Comments »

Trackbacks

  1. Checking In With The Sisters! says:
    March 14, 2009 at 9:23 am

    […] of any age, you will want to head over to 5 Minutes for Books to read Melissa’s review of Voddie Baucham’s “What He Must Be…If He Wants to Marry My Daughter.” With two daughters in my house, this will definitely be on my must read list! Go check out […]

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