Dear Mom

In Dear Mom: Everything Your Teenage Daughter Wants You to Know But Will Never Tell You Melody Carson writes a series of short topical chapters as if she was a teenage girl writing to her mom.

It feels pretty accurate. It’s confrontational as the “teen girl” reminds her mom over and over again that she heeds the mother’s actions more than her words, in regards to the way she treats her friends, her integrity, her religious life, the way she controls her anger (or doesn’t). But underlying all the bravado of a know-it-all teen is a fair helping of insecurity as well.

I loved the way that it was written in the teen voice, because it was a constant reminder of who was speaking and it lent her words some additional weight. It felt shockingly raw and honest, and it’s the kind of conversation every mother of a teen wishes she could have with her teenage daughter — the kind of conversation that isn’t likely to happen for a couple of reasons. If a teen girl tried to say these things to her mom, the mom would immediately become defensive. The second reason is stated in the subtitle — although they sort of want us to know some of these things, they aren’t going to tell us things like they sort of like the safety net that parents’ rules give them, that sometimes they know we know more than they do, and that they don’t always take our guidelines on drinking and other behaviors at face value just because we say so.

This was a quick read, but one that I think that moms of teen girls would find as helpful as I did.

Managing Editor Jennifer Donovan also blogs at Snapshot about life with her tween daughter and preschool son.